 |
| the Chapel of San Pellegrino in Vaticano |
Dear Family and Friends,
I can’t help but remember a year ago today – my first mass
at the chapel of San Pellegrino in the Vatican.
And remember what lead up to it, starting a year before – on December 14th, 2012. I had been searching for a long time for the
right place to do my first mass. At the same time, I had been doubting, for
several reasons, whether I would even make it to ordination. That morning I was
taking care of the family of one of my friends, Father Michael Moriarty, and
had left them in a nice Roman cafe and was heading to my university to attend
some Theology classes. I like to do an hour of silent meditation every morning,
but hadn’t had a chance yet.
Walking down Via del Pellegrino through the Vatican, an open
door caught my eye. I had walked down the same street countless times in my
four years in Rome, but had never noticed the small medieval chapel nestled
between larger Roman Palazzos. Peeking inside, there was no one in sight. I
don’t know what moved me, but I made my decision, “Forget class. I’m going to
do my prayer here.” I knelt down toward the front of the chapel. Multi-colored
light streamed into the small space from large stained glass windows.
And there, in the chapel of San Pellegrino, I received a
tremendous grace, a light – I don’t know what to call it – but I knew then and
there that yes, I would be ordained a priest, and that I would celebrate my
first mass in that very chapel. It was a certainty that I couldn’t doubt,
somehow. I was confirmed in my path unlike ever before. Light, strength, grace…
they all came flooding in. As I left the chapel at the end of my prayer, I
realized that it was exactly a year to the day before my ordination as a priest.
Fast forward six months to June 2013. Now ordained a deacon,
I was about to leave Rome after five unforgettable years in the Eternal City.
Last item on my to-do list? Reserve the Chapel of San Pellegrino for my first
mass, of course. I headed over early one morning, and sure enough, the door was
open. I stepped inside and was greeted by the sight of scaffolding and the
sound of heavy machinery. Apparently, the chapel was under renovation. And try
as I might, I couldn’t find out who was in charge of the chapel or when the
renovation would be finished. So I wrote down a telephone number and headed off
to my new assignment in Cincinnati.
Two months before ordination, I tried the number, but got no
answer. Several times I called, and always, no one answered. People asked me
more and more, “where will your first mass be?” “The Chapel of San Pellegrino,
I think,” would be my reply, and the “I think” got stronger and stronger as
time went on.
“The renovation can’t last 6 months” I told myself. But when
I arrived to Rome and headed over to the chapel, I was greeted yet again by the
same old noise and the scaffolding. This time I was able to talk to the
foreman. His news was disheartening: he had no idea when the renovation would
be finished. It seemed like my first mass would not, could not be at San
Pellegrino.
 |
| my mom and dad waiting for mass in the same pew I prayed in |
Still, I wasn’t about to give up. I asked and asked and
asked around the Vatican until I got the name and number of the priest in
charge of the chapel. Two nights before I was to go on my pre-ordination 8-day
silent retreat, I managed to get through to him. He turned out to be the head
of the Vatican Publishing House, Don Sergio. I explained my situation to him
and my desire to celebrate my first mass at his chapel. I remember his words
“Well, the chapel is still under renovation… but let me check my calendar… Yes,
I have to celebrate Vespers in the chapel on Monday the 16th, so the
renovations will have to be finished by Saturday the 14th. You’ll be
the first one to celebrate mass in the newly renovated chapel of San Pellegrino.”
 |
| celebrating mass for the first time with Father Gregory, an old friend, making sure I didn't mess up too bad |
Wow. God sure had come through. December 15th,
2013 dawned and I found myself celebrating my first mass in the Chapel of San
Pellegrino surrounded by family and friends. The little chapel resonated with
the sound of the organ and the voices of all. It was Gaudete Sunday, one of the
only two days of the year when the priest can wear rose-colored vestments. I
had worried beforehand that I wouldn’t have the right color, or that there
wouldn’t be anyone to play the organ, or that there wouldn’t be anyone to be
altar server…. All of those things were taken care of without my doing anything. I had wanted a chapel with kneelers and heating - a rare find in Rome, and San Pellegrino had both. Two of my sisters sang a beautiful song at the offertory. My mom did the first reading. Everything turned out far better than I could ever have arranged it.
 |
| after mass with my family |
 |
| with my brother Legionary priests and seminarians |
 |
| with my Italian friends |
Last Friday, I was walking by the chapel again for the first
time since my mass there. The door was closed this time, so I took a closer
look at the painting on the front of the chapel. (See picture) It’s of San
Pellegrino (“Saint Pilgrim”), bishop and martyr, to whom the chapel is
dedicated. Below him stands an angel holding a scroll. It reads, “Nulla mihi
patria nisi Christus Nec Nomen Alind Quam Christianus” “I have no fatherland
but Christ, nor name except Christian” I had never seen that before. But it
could be the motto of us all, all of us pilgrims who walk the face of this
earth knowing that it is not our true home. We keep our eyes set on heaven, our
true homeland, and on our Lord Jesus, who will welcome us there. He gives us
glimpses of what heaven will be like so that we don’t lose heart when nothing
seems to be going right.
 |
| close up of the painting on the outside of the chapel |
I glimpsed heaven that day of my prayer, and that day of my
first mass. And I can’t help but offer to God a prayer of gratitude as I think
back on those blessed moments.
May He be with you and bless you,
Father Kevin
